I’m trying to convince myself that I’m not losing you

I could feel you slip away the moment you picked up your morning coffee.

I felt the affection from you weaken as you put your shoes on

I can feel every inch of me wanting to break down on the floor and crumple into a scrunched up paper ball on your rug.

I can feel my eyelids wanting to shut tight, stopping the tears from streaming.

Every second of this feeling, this sense of knowing from routine that something isn’t right.

She pushes her hair behind her ears. Says “Have a good day” to me.

But I know it’s not going to be a good day.

I can’t fight the surge of anaesthetic like feeling through my bloodstream. I felt numb.

When she closes the door behind her, she’ll be in the arms of another.


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